Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
