what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
