I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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