Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
