if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Randomize
