Got a toothbrush?
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Randomize
