Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
3pm strippers are depressing
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
