Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize