glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
too bad you live with your parents still
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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