thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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