I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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