Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
