I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize