He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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