she kept yelling 'call me bella'
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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