Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
