no. you can't hotbox the world.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
