oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize
