I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
