yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
