Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
