i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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