so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
