Porn is love you can see.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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