people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize