Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
