everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
