If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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