just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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