Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
