my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Actions speak louder than pants.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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