He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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