he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
