Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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