just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize