Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
i think im in europe. pls send help
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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