So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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