Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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