Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
