Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize