it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
