We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
