Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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