I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Girls should come with a carfax report
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
