I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize