it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
