He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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