you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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