I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
You may now shotgun with the bride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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