i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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