omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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